Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Things That Are Wrong, Part 3


I woke up with a slight cough and a grumpy attitude and I could feel it coming on... coming on strong... yes, it's time for another installment of Things That Are Wrong...


1. Ribbed turtlenecks. I hate the texture. And I am not convinced they flatter anyone. They don't skim your bumps, they just get roly poly on you and make you look like you're 42 and running the PTA. I know I will take some flack for this because everyone and her dog owns one... but I think it's time we all reevaluated this life choice.

2. Ribbed turtlenecks with people wearing a necklace on the outside of said turtleneck. It's very "church-y girl-runs-the-student-council."

3. Attaching your claw hair clip to the strap of your bag. You know who you are, and you probably wear a Juicy track suit (which was banned on the original TTAW list...)

4. Attaching a scarf to your handbag, like in the Coach ads. Handbags are accessories... they don't needaccessories.

5. Wearing brown for the sake of it. I see people who show up wearing their "brown" outfit. I am not talking about denim with brown slouchy boots and a knit top... I mean an intentionally brown "I-bought-this-to-break-up-all-the-black-i-wear" brown... moderate brown office shoes, brown trousers, maybe a polite creme top. Just stop. It's too hard to manage black and brown in your wardrobe. Just give up brown. It never really looks good, not in its Macy's incarnation, so office ladies of the world - - just stop.

6. Wearing small floral prints. Not even Kate Moss can change my mind on this one. Again, people who wear busy prints are just trying to break up the monotony of their wardrobe. And they break it up with LOOKING EVEN WORSE. Stop with the little poly-blend prints.

Ok... have to go get ready for work...by all means, please leave me ideas for more Things That Are Wrong and I will post and link to your blog today.

23 comments:

the House of Beauty and Culture said...

People who eat in the sreet - just stop it!

Anonymous said...

For men (me, anyway), corduroy shirts have the same awful ribbed feeling. It's not a benign fabric, corduroy, despite its NPR-ish reputation.

Janet said...

Crap. I need to go clean out my closet.

fashiongirl said...

I am so with you on the ribbed turtlenecks and purse accessorizing. My personal hell is those ridiculous little charms that Coach is selling for you bag. Expensive and they make you look like a 6 year old. Ugh!

Richie Designs said...

ah man...totally do the scarf thing on my bag...

my clothes are so classic it's the only way I can feel jazzy on a day to day basis- and put to use the Missoni scarves that I got 2 for 20$ which are too small to wear in your hair and not large enough to keep your next warm.

Kim said...

#5!! Seriously, I was out shopping this weekend and had the same thought. I am tired of managing my brown clothes.

Give me black, and give me some of my sanity back.

studio wellspring said...

2 more additions: women in tube tops and men in tank tops.

Looks hot in Brown said...

Brown? Seriously? But I look great in it! I have a few stunning brown dresses that make my skin look much lovelier than black ever did or could. *sigh* This is terrible, terrible news!

Habitually Chic said...

I'd like to add the stench of cologne that they pump into Abercrombie and that excapes out the front door and makes me want to gag when I walk by! Do you think the employees who actually have to work there are getting "cologne lung" like they work in a mine?!

And while I'm at it, what the hell is an Abercrombie doing on Fifth Avenue anyway! Let's see, Versace, Prada, Cartier, Abercrombie. Which one of these is not like the other?! It's the end of civilation as I know it in NYC!

decorno.blogspot.com said...

LHIB - - Ok, if you look good in brown... rock it. I am thinking you look fierce and not wimply the like poly-clad brown abusers I see coming into the mega-office-building I happen to work in. Exeption is being made for you. But JUST you.

Fairfax said...

do you mean the necklaces that hang over the top of the turtleneck? and just dangle there? ewwwww.

SGM said...

High-waisted pants/jeans will NEVER be okay with me. And I hate it when men wear turtlenecks, although this may be a personal issue. I totally agree with the Abercrombie comment, I can smell it now. Bleh.
Right on the money, Decorno!

JJ said...

omg, sgm, men in turtlenecks is a NEVER NEVER NEVER. I'm so glad you agree. Also, men in any sports jersey for a team they don't play on is a NEVER. And I can appreciate a blue collar man like nobody's business but Carharrt's are gross.

Anonymous said...

Check out the high-waisted pants on p. 53 of the November Domino. Looks like something Ed Grimley would sport.

Anonymous said...

can I just say laugh out loud funny and not just a little chuckle, but a big laugh!!! thank you for brightening up a dark, rainy day here in Boston...I enjoy your blog immensely...keep the original content coming...

looks hot in brown said...

Phew! Thanks for the reprieve. I do rock the brown something ferocious... but must admit that my sleek standby items tend to be black or gray.

I send out a few "amens" every time I read your "Things That are Wrong" lists. Huzzah. Keep up the good work!

katiedid said...

Ribbed turtlenecks...agree. Necklaces, scarves, OK, yes. But I have to have my brown. Black makes me look like death.

One last thing that has to go: Gum chewers. I hate looking at them, especially if they are talking and chewing at the same time, and if I step on one more wad in a hot parking lot, I will scream.

maison21 said...

i have never visited your blog until today, and then i spent far too much time this afternoon reading it. you are fun-nee!

as for things that are wrong: wide leg pants. more wrong: wide leg jeans. wronger than that: the short version of a wide leg pant, culottes. wrongest of all: a divided skirt.

Iheartfashion said...

Ribbed turtlenecks-UGH!
Oversized sweatshirts over leggings: wrong in 1994 and just as wrong in 2007.
Over-the-knee socks and short skirts on anyone over 25 years old OR over 125 lbs or both. That means you, SJP!

djellabah said...

Scarves on handbags? Why ever not? If it was good enough for Babe Paley, it's good enough for you!

dannyboy said...

one thing about abercrombie, they sure know how to do a fund-raiser! $1 and i get to touch a hot half naked boy i used to lust after back when i was in college fighting the "am i gay, am i straight" battle in my head?! hell to the yes! too bad i can't get a receipt for all the dollars i donate and use it as a charitable donation tax write off

Anonymous said...

In regards to the Abercrombie cologne shower, I happened to (admittedly embarrassing) actually like the smell. It intrigued me enough to follow it down the mall (a good 7 storefronts later) to ask the strapping young man the source of said smell, "Oh yeah, it's our men's cologne that I just sprayed outside." Drat! (picture fist shaking motion)! Drats for not being able to pull off men's cologne and drats for your scent shenanigans actually spraying down the mall!

ToujoursPrecoce said...

Scarves on bags are an accessory on an accessory... true. But they can also be a pretty pop of color if you love your hermes but prefer to avoid looking like a stewardess.