Thursday, December 20, 2007

Draped anything grosses me out...


Ok, the photo is from Girl Meets Glamour, and believe me, I heart her blog more than you know. AND I also heart Miles Redd. I mean, can you even imagine anyone you would want to have over for cocktails and over-the-top conversation more than Miles (ok... maybe Mayer Rus ties for this distinction)... so, no knock on either one here, because they both inspire, but what is the deal with fabric draped on tables?

I am sure this post will be more controversial than me suggesting that Jamie Lynn Spears abort her pregnancy (I thought people would throw rocks through my blog's windows, but instead I heard a collective yawn and a small cry for more photos of Anthony Todd rooms... this is why I fucking love you decor freaks), but I just think it's cheap-looking. It always says to me, "I bought the Ballard Design $20 plywood table and covered it with faaaaaancy fabric."

Please... does anyone else think it's weird? Except you, Charlotte Moss. I know you love this shiz (and you know we love you and your Tab-drinking from fancy-ass cut crystal Lalique glasses!), but you can pull this stuff off. It just looks very Tukwila when done in Seattle (this would be very funny if you were a Washingtonian, believe me).

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

eww.

Suzy said...

and this is why we love you back!

Habitually Chic said...

I gotta agree with you. Draped tables are probably my least favorite decorating accent. You always know it's hiding something gross underneath. And they collect dust. Ewww is right.

Anonymous said...

What the hell kind of bedroom is that, anyway? What a mess.

beachgrl said...

I don't like it either. Right now I have a Christmas table cloth draped over a buffet bureau with a Christmas arrangement on top. Every time I look at it it bothers me...haha

Anonymous said...

I wonder if there's a 42-inch plasma hidden under there?! maybe this is an alternative to one of those pop-up cabinets.

Visual Smarts said...

There is only one person who can get away with draping tables and that is the great John Saladino. Anyone else who attempts this risks making the room look like it was the result of one of those horrible HGTV decorating shows involving teams of neighbours wearing coloured shirts. Bleh.

Anonymous said...

The only thing missing from that room is a furnace and a hot water heater.

Be the change..... said...

I agree - draped tables are awful. It makes me think of church fundraisers as a kid. You KNOW there is a cheap-o folding table under that!

Petunia Face said...

Ixnay on the Draped UrnitureFay, for sure. It makes me think of some guy in Times Square selling knock off jewelry under his trench coat. Peek under a draped table and you might find fake Rolex watches of god forbid a perv-penis.

S. said...

Not only does it look messy, but really WHO wants to do "office work" on a desk covered with silky fabric? Too bad, 'cuz I love the rest of the room and usually he's so right-on.

Hill Country House Girl said...

Oooooooh, as my kids would say "Buuuurn"!! I love your honesty and forthrightness! I just hope I am tough enough when you visit me and my house! Seriously, you crack me up! What a great sense of humor and style! Okay, once when we lived in a little 800 square foot farmhouse, I purposely designed and had a table skirt made for a round table to hide baskets of toys under because we had one tiny little living room where we all played - adults and kids! Better than just a piece of fabric?

Jules said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jules said...

The drape is ugly and the color of baby crap. Disgusting.

What do you do when you need the drape? I have a draped end table in my family room, and if you looked under it you'd find the Bose speaker and a mess of wires for the surround sound. There is no way I'd have that all out in the open, and after 7 years I still can't find something to contain it all. My older home can't fit a behemoth entertainment system. (It should have the surround sound, either, but I'm not going to win that argument w/ The Mr. any time soon.)

decorno.blogspot.com said...

Oh Jules, I hear you.

The electronics thing really is a dilemma. You know, the NY Times just posted about design trends that need to die, and one of those quoted in the story blasted the placement of flat-panel TVs over the fireplace. I am having a similar dilemma about electronics because even though you don't really want to give a TV that kind of prime placement in the home, our TV is now taking up a really valuable corner in my front room which could be used for seating. Sometimes, you have to compromise, right? I your case, that means a draped table to cover cables and such. In my case, I think it's going to mean installing a mantle and a tv on the wall so that I can at least get some kind of conversational seating arrangement in the home.

I trust your drape is not the color of baby poo. :)


http://habituallychic.blogspot.com/2007/12/design-police.html

Jules said...

No, its not the color of baby poo, but it is ring-around-the-collar beige. ;)

I read that article, too. I had to chuckle, since being born in Argentina I grew up with cow-hides all over the floors, walls, and furniture.

alis said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
alis said...

you are right.. draped tables remind me of the old cardboard box my mom uses as a bedside table at our summerhouse(where we hardly ever go and never attempted to decorate). what do you think about draped tables at weddings? is there another way?

decorno.blogspot.com said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
decorno.blogspot.com said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cote de Texas said...

I couldn't disagree more! of course I couldn't. There's nothing I love more than a draped dining room table - either round or oval. And believe me, it's not a matter of saving money. At the cost of fabric - a draped dining table can cost more than the real thing. I love the look of the fabric topped table with all it's folds and the correct length brushing the floor. It's romantic and softer looking than a huge piece of wood sometimes. A round draped table can be especially effective in a small square room without much architectural detail. Another application of the draped table I love is the rectanglar table drape topped with a thick piece of glass, tailored, on both sides of a bed. I just couldn't disagree with all of you more. Ballard Designs? what a joke! I'm talking - beautiful fabric, strong and dense, with a lining to give it shape and drape just as a wonderful curtain has.

Lisa said...

Thank you so much for saying what I'm always thinking when I see this in otherwise nicely appointed rooms.

Draped tables say one of two things to me:

Either we are viewing Marvin the Marvelous' home and he is about to saw his lovely assistant in half...

Or some idiot is trying to cover that piece of shit table they should have put in the fire years ago.

It's never the former, it's always the latter. Get rid of that table. Either replace it with a respectable table that can stand on its own or put the chair against the wall and find another place to write the next Great American novel. I have to say, though, even if the table was beautiful and they lost the fabric, I don't like the look of a dsk at the end of a bed. Not very relaxing.

VintageSmith said...

I think it is so you can store all of your extra crap underneath.