General notes for the Gossip Girl crew:
Lydia Hearst: GET OFF MY FUCKING SHOW. Gossip Girl doesn't need you. You look like Nellie on Little House on the Prairie and there is NO WAY Chuck Bass would ever go for your skinny white ass.
Chuck: You wear more foundation than Ru Paul. Tell make-up to go easy on the Ben Nye foundation. Seriously.
Serena: You have the southern California version of Madonna's fake accent. What the fuck is up with your voice? And as much as we are all supposed to love your Kate-Moss-inspired wardrobe, guess what? I don't. Don't love it at all. What was up with that 70s yellow carnation of a dress you were wearing? Dumb. And the gloves? Come on. Also: you're super boring.
Eric van der Woodsen (Connor Paolo): Every time I see you on screen I think, "Good fucking God. This kid MUST have learned to act in NY where every young actor overacts like they are on Broadway, or God forbid, an episode of Fame. Guess what? I was so f-ing RIGHT! Tone it down, cupcake, or Los Angeles will never come calling.
Blair. You are horrible, rotten, no good, bitchy & conniving. Keep up the good work! The way you cut down that imposter bitch was FAB.U.LOUS. You are Heathers reincarnated. Love it.
I don't love much television. But I *really* love Gossip Girl. Good work, team.