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What one thing could you do before labor day....

that would seriously change your life?

Here are 3 things I am going to do:

1) See a specialist to fix pesky problem on my foot that makes walking difficult (seems like a dumb thing to keep putting off, no?).

2) Use more hairspray. Not kidding. My friend Tracy has glorious hair. It is coarse, thick, and stunning in its honey-colored goodness, but above all... it's perfectly styled ALL THE TIME. I asked her the other day, "How do you keep the perfect (I am talking-red-carpet-ready) loose curls in your hair all day?" She answered: "Hairspray. Lots of it. I did my hair YESTERDAY."

That sealed the deal for me. In order to keep my kinda wimpy hair in check, bitch is gonna spray the shit out of it. In fact, I am rocking some pretty fluffy chic hair at the moment, thanks to Salon Grafix Freezing Hair Spray, the modern girl's Aqua Net.

3) Lose 10 pounds. I would like to lose more. But honestly, when you have a big goal, you need to start with manageable chunks. So 10 lbs. in a month. I can do this.

That's all. If I do those 3 things by Labor Day, my life will be much better.

I mean, the hair already is.

So what's your thing gonna be?


Anonymous said...

Huh? "Lose 10 lbs in one month"... but, don't you have 'til Labor Day to do this? I is confoozed.

Decorno said...

Ha! :)

I want to lose more than 10, so I want to knock out the first 10 in one month. After the first 10 come off, there will be more to follow. And believe me, I will need all summer to shake the next 10.

Make sense?

birdy said...

I got on the scale Thursday, shrieked loudly and began my get 10-pounds off ASA-effing-P.

I'd also like to get my fingernails looking a bit more spiffy. Right now they're short, blunt and not at all attractive. I dream of having perfect nails.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the clarification. Will now have to think about my own 3 goals instead of picking yours apart...

visual vamp said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
visual vamp said...

I already use Aqua Net daily. I'm already "eating" hideous Nutri System as solidarity with the hubs who must lose 50 or die. That shit is so bad, you don't want to eat a thing. I'm aiming for 10 too. But my 3-by-Labor-Day are house things - finish the second bath renovation that has been going on for over a year (because we're doing it, and we get lazy), do something with the hideous yard (dynamite?), save for and get a couch. Not very glam, not much fun, but hey, I already use hairspray...

Decorno said...

Ha! I think "dynamite" is exactly the thing I need for a few of my renovations, too. :)

Robin said...

1) Overdue kitchen mini-remodel (counters, floor, lighting, appliances).

2) Get back my stamina so that I can keep up with the BF on the bicycle.

3) I think that's all I can handle.

PS -I'm with your friend with the hair. Hairspray is wonderful, I'm always getting compliments on "yesterday's hair".

Anonymous said...

Have any of you spay lovers tried Ellnet? Hard to get, but worth it!

Kelly Anne said...

I generally avoid hairspray because of the false, sticky feeling it gives my hair, but I might have to reconsider. As for goals...

(1) Clean out my goddamn closet and get some pretty canvas bins for additional clothing storage.

(2) Give my bedroom its white base coat. Even though I've yet to pick a final color, the base is easy enough.

(3) New haircut. Bangs.

perchance said...

You can buy L'Oreal's Elnett in the grocery store here in New Zealand. I nearly fell over when I saw it. It's the Bugatti of hairsprays, but an ozone depleter and supposedly carcinogenic. Hurting polar bears has repercussions.

Anonymous said...

I don't know when Labour day is as I'm not in the usa. But in the next 3 weeks I would like to

1) finish organizing, tidying my workspace and new crafting space at home
2)continue on my diet till I go on holiday to Italy
3)get pet things for 2 new kitty catties who will be joining our family after said holiday
but 4)first I have a presentation at uni on Friday that I need to prepare (uugh)

Kwana said...

I'll take up that 10 lbs with you since I keep playing at it anyways. Thanks for the push!

i suwannee said...

kelly anne: bangs are hard.

decorno: what's wrong with your foot?

and i'd like to get foam sprayed under our basement. EXOTIC!

remember when i used to be MYSTERIOUS and QUIET.

i now i comment on everything like some drunk slut.

Decorno said...

Jamie - happy birthday!

My foot: when I stand on it for more than a few hours, it's not very functional the next day. The ankle seizes up and I can't really walk. It's happened since I was a kid, but the "can't walk" part seems to last much longer these days. I decided I like being mobile, so I am finally going to get it checked out by some foot doctor... he's popular, since I can't get in until end of month.

simply seleta said...

Decorno, if you want to lose weight, and keep it off, consider getting the book "The Yeast Connection" by William G. Crook, M.D. If nothing else, it will help you understand the cravings for sugar + carbs [if you have any] and how you can totally change your life by eating differently. I just saw a homeopathic M.D. who alerted me to this whole world.

I'll be honest, I'm doing it and it's been a challenging 3 weeks. But I believe it will be worth it in the end.

simply seleta said...

Aerogel by Tri is the best hairspray on the planet. Used it for years and it holds hair like no other. Get the aerosol spray. It's a white can with a hot pink top.

Of course it is probably 85% of the reason we have a hole in our ozone layer.

Anonymous said...

Beat up more waiters for being rude.

Julia said...

1. Eat healthier
2. Spend more time outside (perhaps getting tanner in the process...)
3. Get our bedroom a few steps closer to done.

Anonymous said...

Is it just me or is anyone else getting a little sick of the GREEN thing? I get that we need to all do our part but I really get the feeling that the media and mags are just hopping on the next "chic trend celebrity cause" to sell, sell, sell. Give me a break. If I get one more Domino mag that features all green I'm going to throw up. I was green before carbon offsets were around to buy so the elite could ease their conscious when they hopped on board there private jets. PULEEZ.

Joslyn said...

i can always count on you to say out loud the things i'm just thinking.

re: it. perhaps even addicted to it. i'm mocked shamelessly for this in fact...but sadly, it is my desert island essential.

JJ said...

Before Labor Day I am going to:
1. convince you to buy that Yeast book.
2. borrow it.
3. Lose 20 pounds.
4. find a new career.
5. plan a fabulous trip.
6. identify source to fund trip (i.e. rich boyfriend).

becoming-home said...

I remember the first time I used hairspray. Shockingly, it was only a year or so ago. It was like Oh, so THATS what everyone has been talking about all this time!

franki durbin said...

oh boy. what would I do? honestly, my schedule was thrown out of what a few month ago from some 'unforeseen activities' and I was in the middle of launching a new site. I need to just wrap it up and launch it rather than waiting. Seriously.

I also need to catch up on emails. I have this (constantly growing) mental to-do list that would horrify me if I added it to my physical to-do list.

But on to your list.. my recommendation? Kickboxing. It will strip pounds off of you like nobody's business. Not to mention the sexy shape your muscles will take on. Seriously. Hot, hot, hot, baby!

metromom said...

1. Stop pushing my hair behind my makes me look mom-ish.

2. Lose 10 lbs sounds good. I am two weeks into the South Beach Diet and have lost 8 so far...10 more by labor day would be great.

3. Get (and stay) organized. That's a big one, but it would seriously change my life for the better.

Jules said...


The only picture I've seen of you makes me wonder where you even have 10 pounds to lose. Maybe on your bum foot? Tell me you are just selective of the pictures you upload and that your down angle shots are hiding a couple extra pounds, because right now I don't see it.

I second Seleta on that book. I am going to buy it--right now I have The Candida Yeast Book and it is very enlightening. A problem with yeast overgrowth does cause cravings for carbs, sugar, and alcohol.

Jules said...

Oh yeah, my list.

1. Get organized.
(a) Finish kitchen remodel
(b) Finish redecorating family room
(c) Finish furnishing covered patio

2. Stop procrastinating--no more working until midnight and getting up at crack of dawn.

3. Get healthy
(a) Buy book
(b) Eat better
(c) Exercise

Decorno said...

Well, Jules... that photo you have seen is only my head. Plus it's about years old. I've got a little more junk in the trunk this days. You can ask JJ. She will vouch for that.

Anonymous said...

my gonna be is to give you advice
its what i do

to help you curb your sometimes funny but sometimes not funny attacks on beautiful people and that is:

would it kill you to enter AA or just stop blogging drunk?

Come on Decorno your psychotic jealousy is overpowering your talent as a writer

You could be a best seller on the NYT but only if you can tone down the hateful racist side of your prose? You are self destructing and that concerns me as a radio talk show host.

just a suggestion
join a three step
find God
volunteer at a soup kitchen
but curb you drinking

Good luck with your hair and poundage. I sympathize
I find a low carb diet to be the most effective. Then there's always slim fat

yours truly
Dr. Laura Schleesanger

Anonymous said...

So you're saying that hateful racism is BAD, Dr. Laura? I'm confused...

Michelle said...

My labor day things:

1. Lose 10 more lbs.
2. Paint the dining room & obtain a rug.
3. Finish kitchen makeover (cabinet painting, wallpaper down, painting walls)

Bonus 3 for husband:

1. Front yard
2. Back yard
3. Call a handyman about the front of the house.

Easy and Elegant Life said...

1. Live up to my wardrobe. I have a stack of ironing and polishing to do.

2. Start the serious workouts again.

3. Relax and enjoy my birthday and the madness of the weekend that surrounds it.

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