Monday, July 21, 2008


"My name is Virginia. I’m in my thirties because I screwed up my original plan, which was to OD in a nightclub bathroom at 25 with panties around my ankles and a wet cigarette in my mouth. I am constantly going to baby showers and being made to endure foul acts, such as sniffing and identifying various brands of chocolate melted into diapers, which is against the Godiva convention. Meanwhile, I can do a special dance and hear my lone, desiccated egg rolling around inside me like a burnt-out popcorn kernel..."


I don't even know what to say. This is pretty much the funniest thing I have ever read, and I know some seriously funny bitches.

Read the whole thing HERE, at I Could Kill Her, a blog so weird and funny and brilliant that I don't really know what to make of it.


Photo by Joel Sanders.

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

ahhhh. Nothing helps a girl wake up in the morning like a photo of a mini shrieking Fuhrer!

a. said...

That was great. I just spit out my coffee.

SGM said...

I KNOW. Elaine is one of the funniest people on the earth.

Anonymous said...

Elaine, SGM, and Decorno: The only three blogs you need to read.

please sir said...

This was so funny to read - did you also see the one about dogs? I'm right there with her!

Be the change..... said...

That was the funniest thing I have ever read! LOL
That image of the girl in the kitchen reminds me of like.....a single girl in the suburbs obsessed with 'Amelie' -a great movie but some people take it too far...........YOU ARE NOT AMELIE!

sherri said...

thanks for bringing this to my attention. the baby in the dog carrier was both hilarious and disturbing. adding you the list, so glad I now know of your blog.
you do not dissapoint.

icouldkillher said...

Nothing makes me happier than some Decorno love. Thank you, my love! And you too, SGM!

porter hovey said...

This is just too much! Love it! Love her blog . . . and even more love that picture! BRILLANT!!!

Anonymous said...

BTC: you are cute AND smart. Damn.

Lisa said...

Elaine? Huh. You sure this isn't another blog that YOU created? (Insert most annoying emoticon I can find here).

s. said...

This blog didn't used to be this funny or this well-written. I'm glad to see how far it's come, baby.

FancyPants-design said...

LOL! Weird..and I am slightly disturbed by it..?

Christina Kim said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Decorno said...

Christina - saw your comment that you later deleted... I just love the photo ( and the photographer.. I bought the "Cameron" print from his PCNW show.

Let me know if you think you friend would want me to take the photo down. I don't mind. :) It's really just to keep the site looking adorable, but admittedly it has nothing at all to do with the post.

Gina said...

Holy sh@t...that blog is crazy. I've rss'd it...yes, blog readers DO rock.