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Some photo from some blog scanned by some chick who stole it from some magazine...

Well holy shit, today was fun.

Last night when I posted "HOWDY, STRANGER," not too many comments rolled in for quite some time and I was thinking, "Well, gee, what do you expect? There you go tossing a poll out there expecting them to write today's post for you, you lazy ass..." And then you did just that! That long delay was just about 80 of you crafting your responses to our little poll. God bless all of you.

Here are some hightlights from today's telethon:

My favorite thing "everyone would be surprised to know about you" as shared in comments was: "I smoke weed before cleaning my house." Ha!

I also loved the story about meeting your husband at Hooters after he wrote, "You're so cute," on your napkin.

I loved the brave honesty of the confession that one of you might be divorced in a year. (Maybe you want that? Maybe you don't and it's just coming undone? Either way, it's not easy. Hang in there, kid.)

I love that I have so many Portlanders reading this. Longtime readers know that it's my hometown and my favorite city. I am jealous of you guys living there.

I loved Robin stating her age followed by, "reluctantly," as though she has any choice in the matter. That cracked me up.

I love Dean "the girl with the boys name" and that she wants to get married soon (Dean! Wait! You have all kinds of time for that!).

I read through every comment and thoroughly enjoyed them all. Thanks for speaking up, especially those who usually lurk.

So who reads this? Here's the census:

1. Lots of you like SNARKINESS. Many of you didn't even mention decor. You just mentioned snark. Holy cow! Why the fuck am I writing about lamps? This decor business has been a total waste. (Kidding..)

2. Lots of chicks read the blog. Followed by chicks who also happen to be stay-at-home-moms (which my friend Nick & I like to call "stay-at-homies," because it makes you bitches sound all gangsta and tough, which you kinda have to be when you're fighting spit-up and cranky toddlers all day), followed by gay men (of which club I am an honorary member). I don't think I got any love from a single lesbian out there. Where my lezzies at? (Can I bring that word back? Is it totally banned? Because I think it has a certain charm.)

3. Many people said they liked the longer posts, or at least where I actually bother to write something. I certainly enjoy writing them, but they can sometimes leave me feeling like a self-important wanker (which I might be... I just try not to think about it because I don't want to own up to any douchebagginess). It's a fine line to walk, writing a blog. It's such narcissism to begin with to assume people give a damn about you or your stories. But the good news was that a couple of you mentioned liking my more sincere, non-snarky posts, and that's good, because while I am railing on PAM ANDERSON one day, it's nice to show the kids that I have a heart about, say, matters of FAMILY (my unusual family) and LIFE IN GENERAL.

4. A few of you mentioned that you don't like it when I post a photo and just write, "DISCUSS." Leah, you didn't exactly say you didn't like it, you said it was lazy. And you're totally right. It's IS lazy. It started as a joke. I was talking to a bunch of people at this thing, and I told them, you know, when you're stuck for blog material, just post a photo and ask, "Yes or No." And bacon had come up in the conversation and I think it was John Tusher who blurted out hysterically, "BACON: Yes or No?" as an example, and so I posted it when I got home and it got like 70 comments (you people are passionate about your bacon, clearly). So when I have a particularly brutal workday and I can't even think of something compelling to write, that's what you get. Sorry dudes. Sometimes, it's all that this free press can muster. But Pieter you are right... sometimes it's like throwing chum to the sharks (as SGM puts it.) But the comments are usually quite amusing around here, so why not let all the readers have the action? (Especially you, Anon. I should be paying you a royalty... just as soon as this blog starts makin' momma some cold hard cash...)

5. You fools are so, um, tech savvy. I never used Google reader or any such blog "subscription" service until several weeks ago when everyone was going bananas about the Holly Becker ARTICLE/POST about editing the "noise" our of your life by limiting your blog intake or whatever. Anyway, people were like, "Wha? Why edit? It's called a READER," and I was all, "Yeah, it's called a READER, bitches!" But, um, I didn't really know what a reader was. I mean I knew, but I'd never used GOOGLE READER or anything. And so very recently, I started using Google reader, and holy god, you people are so smart. Why didn't someone just TELL ME that it's like Tivo for your blogs. I always say Tivo lets you watch more and better TV in less time, and this whole reader business is the same. If you all could please use TV analogies in the future, that would really help me, k? Look, I am a dinosaur. You people are way ahead of me. (You probably all Twitter, huh? I mean... do you? I actually want to know. And what is this Tumblr thing? Jesus, will someone please send me an Internet 2.0 decorder ring?)

So that's the recap. You guys are fun (and very funny). Thanks for playing. Come back soon.


Elizabeth said...

I am so stealing that Stay At Homie thing. Awesomeness.
Also, yes, to Twitter, but I always feel kinda dirty afterwards, I won't lie.

wndl said...

okay, here's your lezzie, and i'm a sahm, and the think i most enjoy about your site is the snark. I also use google reader and don't enjoy the photo/discuss posts. And i'm in olympia, wa - which is close to portland.

Be the change..... said...

Lezzies is totally reign to use it

Anonymous said...

I didn't answer that poll, but I do love the snark, especially the gay snark.

Anonymous said...

Oh, sorry... I did answer the first post with info but the sexual stuff was undisclosed. I'm bi, is that close enough to lesbian?

Also, I have had a threesome with two guys, but they were not stars of Law & Order franchises. However, I did suggest that once in your comments section.


Anonymous said...

I've had the same experience, though I was thinking of Chris Meloni through most of it.

franki durbin said...

oh, I love a good de-lurking session! Sorry I missed the initial post.... but I am still picking myself up off the floor from laughing at "stay-at-homies"...and, yes, I'm hijacking that phrase. Proudly!

okay... I'm late... but I'll go read the initial post now and pretend I was aware of it all along ;)

Ditto said...

I didn't answer, because I thought, eh, why would she care to read about me? But now? Now you've called me out. :) So, here goes:
I am 26, female, madly in love with my female partner.
I check all of "my blogs" on a daily basis, except weekends.
I ran across your blog somehow, I don't even know now. The pictures were beautiful and creative and drew me in. But then I read a few posts and I was hooked. You are hilarious! I don't know if I have a favorite type though.
I have 26 blogs bookmarked. They are lesbian mommies (although I am not a mom yet), decorating, an off beat wedding site, and sewing blogs.
Hmm, surprised to know about me? My name is Dodie. It's not short for anything, yes it's on my birth certificate, and I've made peace with it finally.
My top 3 must reads are: Dorothy Surrenders, An Accident Of Hope and Sew Retro.
Just in case you care I'm located in Colorado. Ok, enough about me. Haha. Thank you for your fabulous blog. I really enjoy it!

Anonymous said...

Another lezzie reader here - and not a stay at homie yet, but will be!

"Lezzie" totally has certain charm to it. I use it all the time, and you should feel free to as well.

I like the design and the laughs, and I usually stop by a few times a week. I missed the first poll because of "work" - ew.

maison21 said...

love lezzie, and i prefer to be referred to as a homosexual myself- i think it has a certain old school charm...

Anonymous said...

Another lesbian chiming in. I check your blog daily--for the snark.

The Curmudgeon said...

Yet another lurking lesbian! Reading for the snark, and for the purty pictures.

Joanna Goddard said...

that is so fascinating.

Anonymous said...

Ok, de-lurking here. I am a 38 year old SAHM. I live in the Dallas area. I read your blog daily and way too many others. I love all the snarky posts but I love the beautiful pictures too. You seriously crack me up. I read lots of celebrity gossip blogs, mommy blogs and decor blogs.

Decorno said...

Aw lezzies. I am so glad you're out there.

And Franki - you're a mom? How did I miss this??

franki durbin said...

yes, Decorno... how bizarre is that? 3 months ago to be exact. Fortunately, I've suffered none of the previously known side effects: I haven't cut off my hair, I'm not running around in Juicy track suits and I still wear my Chanel Glossimer every day. (wiping brow in relief)

I'm not sure what causes so many to suffer the plight of "mom jeans," but I'm glad I avoided catching that disease. ha!

Tanja said...

oh dear god, how have i gone so long without google reader?
thank you! Maegan said...

wow. where have you been all my life? I'm adding you to my dailies ...NOW.

Anonymous said...

Thanks to this post I have learned:
When reading this blog at work, must cover mouth to prevent laughing out loud. Then plug nose to prevent the o my god my sides are splitting laugh/snort.

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