Saturday, January 29, 2011

Gawker comment of the week: Sorry, vagina--looks like it's just you and me.

Me: "Hey vagina, we need to talk. Listen, I'm going to have to keep you under lock-and-key for awhile. You see, in the event that some guy slips me a roofie or the guy I'm seeing doesn't understand the meaning of the word 'no', and the 'non-forcible rape' results in pregnancy, I probably won't be able to afford taking care of the microscopic cells that will morph into a womb-dwelling childbeast. I just don't have the time or the money to deal with such things, and since it's clearly my responsibility to not get raped (except when it's 'rape rape'--that's the only time when my non-consent has merit), I'm just going to have to go through extreme preventative measures."

Vagina: *protest*

Me: "Yes, I'm aware that I could choose to pump myself full of hormones to prevent pregnancy, but unfortunately my student health insurance does not cover birth control, so it looks like that's out, as well. Sorry, vagina--looks like it's just you and me."


Context HERE.


If you're pro-choice, there is no better time than now to automate a small (or big) monthly contribution to two great organizations:

NARAL - - these bitches get all up in that legislative and lobbying business on behalf of your little uterus.

Half of U.S. counties have no abortion services at all. A women I knew a while back was a provider, and we were chatting about the state of abortion access, and I said, "It's insane how limited access is. I mean, what do these girls do?" Exasperated, she just shot me a look and said, "They have babies." (MTV/Teen Mom thanks you, 51% of counties with no access to abortion services!)

Anyhoo - - this woman said CAIR is the best organization to help if you actually want to help a girl in the sticks get an abortion if she doesn't have means or access. Yes, that's right... here's how you can help a young woman GET AN ABORTION. I said it.

CAIR

32 comments:

The Townhouselady said...

I love you for this post.

Not creepy rape-ish love but a deep appreciation for your having posted this love.

Best-
The Pro-Choice (let me clarify for those in the cheap seats, not pro-abortion, pro-CHOICE)Townhouselady

juleesing1 said...

Pro-Choice YES! Great post. Pro-Choice has never meant you have to have an abortion, only that you may choose to have one if that's the right choice for YOU.

I believe I'm both Pro-Choice and Pro-Life. What better choice than choosing the life I want to have? And allowing others the freedome of their own choice? To me that's Pro-Life -- MY life, and YOUR life, and every other woman's life, individually.

Penelope Bianchi said...

BRAVO! THAT IS WHAT I SAY.....ALL CAPS ON PURPOSE!!

BRAVO!

Penelope


I love you for this post; too. I love you for all your posts....and am so happy you are back!

Dana@Mid2Mod said...

I've never really figured out what conservatives don't understand about the word "choice." It's not a difficult concept. But then they seem to have a problem with the word "rape" too, if they've created some sort of hierarchy and think "forcible" is the only bad kind and all the rest are either acceptable...or the woman's fault. Maybe it's just me, but I can't think of any kind of rape a Republican would want his daughter to experience. Could there be a bit of a double standard here?

jessie said...

Thank you (from the depths of my heart)!

Anonymous said...

rape-love? As in " damn, he made sweet, sweet rape love to me and i got knocked up. Hand me that coat hanger, will ya?"

Anonymous said...

Amen Sister!

Meg Blocker said...

I second Townhouselady. This post absolutely rules.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your post. I have really missed you and so glad you are back with your insight wrapped in humor.

It is "PRO-CHOICE" - have trouble understanding women who do not support a "woman's right to choose!"

Anonymous said...

Thanks- just gave a hefty donation to my favorite pro-life organization. That "choice" you keep talking about involves destroying a human life.--not an appendage or a tumor but an innocent life. Thankfully, this country keeps beoming more "pro-life" and less comfortable with the idea of abortion.

mary said...

Thanks for this post--it takes courage. Personally, I'm pro-choice, but not pro-abortion (if that makes any sense?). The fact that free birth control pills, condoms or other means are not available to teenagers (they are having sex whether we know or approve) results in teenagers (children-the brain is not fully developed until after +/- 25yrs.) having babies and the never-ending circle of poverty and ignorance and abuse. As a society we can do a lot better. Mary

Decorno said...

Anon: Define hefty.

Anonymous said...

Bummer. I have respected and enjoyed your style and your gutsy humor since you first began posting. But yesterday you crossed a line and I lost respect. At the very least, both sides of the debate need to acknowledge that they are right...and wrong...depending on the initial premise. No matter where you stand, both sides must also admit that this is a VERY sensitive subject. But your posting did nothing to advance the debate but rather inflame it even more. I had hopes that your wicked humor could strike the balance of asserting your opinion but also deflect some of the time-held tension. Don't expect you to care but I suppose that's the whole point of a "comment section."

Anonymous said...

CAIR? The Council on American Islamic Relations is pro-choice? That sure blew me away for a couple of minutes. My head was going to explode. Shaiah law is pro-choice? Sort of like the Osama bin Laden day-care centers your senator was fantasizing about a while back. (Taliban Tot Lot?) I do think that your CAIR needs to change its name. Fast.

How did you miss this? Isn't the kind of absurdity you relish?

Adra said...

Mary needs to shut up. We are talking about RAPE. Not some idiot teenagers having consensual sex and ending up preggers. RAPE. Did you miss that? R-A-P-E. Get off your high horse.

Decorno said...

Anon 7:37: You lost respect because you don't share my point of view? That's weird.

Also, let's be clear: nothing in my post intended to "advance debate." I wanted to get people to donate to NARAL, and to also fund an organization that helps women in need afford their abortion. Plain and simple. I think the debate has raged on long enough. It's time for pro-choice people to put their money where their mouth is, fund groups that advance women's rights, and help fund necessary medical procedures that others are trying to restrict, defund, or outlaw. I don't think I could have been any clearer.

Anonymous said...

I had hopes that your wicked humor could strike the balance of asserting your opinion but also deflect some of the time-held tension.

Translation: You wanted to feel pleased with yourself.

Anonymous said...

To Anon 1/30/11 7:38pm: The acronym CAIR is used by a variety of organizations, you dunderhead: The Community Abortion Information & Resource Project; the California Association for Institutional Research; the Center for AIDS Intervention Research; the Centre for Artificial Intelligence and Robotics; the Center for Advanced Imaging Research; and yes, the Council on American-Islamic Relations. Acronyms, you see, may be shared. Always good to look before you leap - and maybe even think.

Nikki said...

I give to NARAL every year. Something about the government telling me what to do with my body just doesn't seem right. I don't agree with women who use it as a form of birth control, but in instances of rape...like you said. Great post!

I also think insurance should continue to cover abortions. Did you know that some DNC procedures (as in miscarriages)are listed as an abortion and if insurance drops that coverage, woman who require a DNC will either have to pay out of pocket for the expensive prodecure, or pick the cheap route..take a pill and go home to cramp and lose your baby on your own.

Kelie said...

I wonder why the people against this post are posting anonymously? That's weird, I mean stand up or shut up, honestly.

Nikki said...

Some light switch came on and made me come back and say that it's D&C...not DNC. I wrote that before coffee.

Laura @ the shorehouse. said...

There are many people who have crossed the line in this debate (like Rep. Chris Smith, for example) but you are not one of them. Thank you for sharing and urging pro-choice supporters to back these organizations.

Anonymous said...

I just had an abortion a month ago. Every morning, I wake up thankful that I'm not going to have a baby... and that I could afford the several hundred dollars the procedure cost. I've always been pro-choice and am grateful so many others feel the same.

Anonymous said...

"Abortions for some, miniature American flags for others!"

--The Simpsons

life, in small chunks said...

Great post. Needs to be said over and over again. Some younger women (younger than me anyway) don't realize how important this issue is sometimes. And, yes, it is odd that the few who didn't like this post chose to be anonymous, isn't it? thanks,
Karin

maison21 said...

i'll never understand the morons who get so worked up about a bundle of cells, but could give a shit about the well-being of the woman, or the child once it is born.

Bloggers Abode said...

It needs to stay legal, available and safe. And then everybody should shut up about it. As much as I advocate the need for it I can also sympathize with people that don't agree and the hurt they feel when it's thrown in their face. It's a very sensitive subject and needs respect on both sides. Let it be and then STFU.

s said...

Regardless of how you feel about abortion, every woman in America should be OUTRAGED that a bunch of men are deciding that if you were roofied, you weren't really raped. Because the drugs made you too loopy to 'fight back' he didn't use force, ergo you weren't raped. Because rape by its very definition implies lack of consent, legally there is no category for non-forcible rape, or nonconsensual rape. Is there even such thing as nonconsensual sex that isn't rape? I prefer the other Gawker comment that referred to this as "Bitches be Lying Act".

As for cases of incest, just because your father or uncle didn't use physical force to rape you, that doesn't mean it wasn't forcible rape. Its this sort of thing that makes my blood pressure go through the roof.

Jane K. Schott said...

These men continue to make the rules and then somewhere down the line they get stuck with their dicks in the wrong places...meanwhile we have to live with these antiquated laws.

I cannot believe that I have lived my entire life fighting for the Rights of Women. One of the saddest aspects of
my life.

kerry said...

AMEN!!!!!

Nikki, a D&C is sometimes done after an "incomplete sponteous abortion," or if there were complications to a "spontaneous abortion." Spontaneous abortion = miscarriage.

Susan said...

Yeah, I usually love your humor, too, but I see nothing funny about abortion. And I'm all for choice until it becomes a ready-excuse for ending human life. You probably won't care, but I'm unsubscribing after this comment.

Anonymous said...

Wow, that took balls to put out there! Thank You! I agree with your thought that those of us who are Pro Choice need to help fund the organizations who keep it a CHOICE! One never knows what your going to post about...I LOVE how you surprise me!